"Are you eating Nerds?" -Bobby
"You are what you eat." -Alexis
(Shakes head) "You're an idiot. Do they have anything over there called Dumbass?" -Bobby
"What word do guys use more- cock or dick?" -A certain unnamed family member
"Oh my god. I knew when you started that sentence it couldn't go anywhere good but I had no idea how bad it would be." -Alexis
"I wonder if actual swimmers have better swimmers..." -Kiel after the Olympics
"Congratulations. You've just become blacker than me." -Jacqui
"Yes. Score one for Claudia." -Claudia
"I can't believe I just drank a Pabst's Blue Ribbon. Oh my god I need to meet someone." -Jacqui
(While lying in bed watching a movie)
"Whose crying?" -Kiel
"Jean-Claude Van Damme." -Alexis
"So...I got bent in a way I don't bend." -Jil
"He's a fox. And when he's fighting, he's a fox. Especially when he's covered in other people's blood." -Claudia (on UFC's St. Pierre)
" 'What did you learn in school today?' 'How to give myself an orgasm just by sitting and moving.' " -Claudia
"Oh god, it's like a chicken cutlet getting breaded." -Patti (when sand got on her boobs in a bathing suit)
(Superfreak comes on the radio)
"Oh my god, can you please change it?" -Alexis
"Hey, I want a little funk in my life!" -Dad
"Salt? Salt anyone? No?" -awful band at Vintage while singing Margaritaville
"The ghetto white chick got knocked up. Big surprise!" -Claudia
"Does anyone from Abington amount to anything?" -Carol
"Bob Saget!" -Alexis
"In case you haven't noticed by now, I wear a bra that can carry midgets." -Claudia
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